Get Your Family Involved in Funeral Planning

Steve McCowen • January 3, 2024

When death is near or has just occurred, there are so many things to do and yet there is nothing you can do. You feel helpless. You can’t make the person well or bring them back. But you know you will, very soon, need to make many decisions about the service, the final resting place, the music, food, flowers, donations, clothing and much more. Your mind is racing and oddly enough, at the same time, at a complete standstill. On one hand it feels like it is too soon to do anything. You’re just not ready. But at the same time, you feel the weight of all that is coming.


This is stress. It is hard. If you can, reach out to your family and friends and let them help you. Have your son or daughter get the older grandchildren involved in pulling together pictures and music. They are really good at this stuff. Going through the pictures brings back happy memories and it’s one of the most therapeutic chores that comes with funeral preparation. Let them do something that will help them - they are dealing with this loss too.


If would you would like family and friends to donate to a charity, put someone in charge of looking into that. Have your daughter-in-law pull together a few clothing choices for your final selection. Send your son-in-law to the cemetery or have him get the cars washed. You may want to delegate the task of writing the eulogy and obituary. Give someone the job of gathering information for the funeral luncheon or brunch. 


Spread the work around. Let go, embrace help and give them something to do. You’ll feel better that things are getting done and they’ll feel better because they are involved and helping.


www.amsfuneralhomes.com

Since the early 1920s, Avink McCowen Secord Funeral Homes and Cremation Society has had the honor of supporting families through loss. They are proud to serve families throughout Plainwell, Vicksburg, Portage, Schoolcraft, and surrounding communities such as Kalamazoo, Pavilion, Flowerfield, Otsego, Alamo, and more. Their caring and professional funeral directors assist families in the planning of funeral services, burial services, memorial services, and cremation services. To learn more, visit amsfuneralhomes.com.

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By Steve McCowen • April 10, 2026
Families in Portage, Michigan often ask what is required from the next of kin when planning a burial or cremation. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), written authorization from the legal next of kin is typically needed before any final arrangements can begin.

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By Steve McCowen • March 10, 2026
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By Steve McCowen • February 6, 2026
Families in Portage, Michigan, often ask how much cremation costs and what factors influence pricing. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the median cost of a funeral with cremation is approximately $6,280, while direct cremation generally ranges from $2,800 to $3,000.

How Much Does a Funeral Cost in Portage, Michigan?

By Steve McCowen • January 9, 2026
Families in Portage, Michigan, often wonder what to expect when planning a funeral. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), the median cost of a funeral with viewing and burial is approximately $8,300, while the median cost of a funeral with cremation is about $6,280.

What To Expect with Cremation?

By Steve McCowen • February 10, 2025
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What do you do with Cremated Remains?

By Steve McCowen • January 9, 2025
What happens when no one decides what to do with the six pounds of cremated remains that are left following the funeral or memorial service? You might be surprised at some of the unusual places where they show up.

Writing the Thank You Notes

By Steve McCowen • December 6, 2024
Writing thank you notes is usually one of the very first “after the funeral” tasks you will undertake. You may be surprised to find that your brain/hand coordination is not working so well. You sit there with pen in hand and well-formed thoughts in your head, but somehow it all gets lost between the head and the paper. Don’t despair. This is normal and it’s all part of the grief journey.

Dad Died. What Do I Do with the Pills?

By Steve McCowen • December 6, 2024
In order to keep drugs from falling into the wrong hands (children, pets, and addicts) the FDA recommends that you dispose of all medication as soon as possible. They suggest three options.

Mother Died...How Long Do We Keep Her Things?

By Steve McCowen • December 6, 2024
Separating from a loved one’s belongings is one of the more difficult jobs you will have to do after a death. It is amazing how much is collected over a lifetime. You probably won’t get it done in a day and you will probably shed a few tears.

Cremation Society or Funeral Home

By Steve McCowen • December 6, 2024
Cremation, like electric cars and cell phones is here to stay. For some people cremation is part of their religious practice. For other people, cremation just feels right for them. The big question is who should help you with your cremation, a society or a funeral director?